Hear me go hurhur.

and hurhur.

Recent Entries

28th-Feb-2011 05:16 am - trying to salvage...something in my brain.

HELLO EVERYONE!!! IM BACK!

no idea whos moved on from here but oh well.

it seems like when i stopped putting down my thoughts in black and white
they seem to just dissolve into the wind.
which is what my head contains also.
haha
and then i cant rememeber any shit.

i guess blogging helps me slow down my thoughts.
too many. or too little.
i dont even know.
cos i cant bloody rememebr.
i think my brain has some difficiency
because i dont think anyone in this world could have any less stands and opinions as i do.
when i do not blog.

when i do not blog.
i do not really think. deep.
im like pawn.
i need text.
yet text bores me.
i create text but never take it in properly.
haha

anyway im here to blog cos i need inspiration
what is inspiration?
i might have thought i had it but some would think i was just being stupid.
oooh shot down. right in the head. connected to the heart.
start again. new ideas. die again.
why the hell...i must have gave up somewhere in the middle? didnt i?

anyway to sound more sec sch ish and personal ish.

recently ive been having bad skin ever since i stopped taking the meds for my face.
ok ijust have white heads thats about it.
nvm. ive stopped being so emo shitty thank God.

and ive stopped giving a fuck so much.
which does not help me with my lack of ... a stand. in life.
no i do not have a stand for relgion.
nor love.
nor family.
nor education.
nothing political

what else is there besides.
emotions and pretty visual stuff.

maybe id find a link there.
but it would only end up with. abstract.
well that is the link isnt it.
its emotions captured in pretty visual stuff.
and i use pretty. cos the world is shallow.

so am i.

ok so anyway.
recently
i went to the emergency room
i think tehre is something wrong with my nerves.
i have no clue and its annoying me.
OMG i actually am reacting to a situation. oh i feel human for a sec.
yeah but its not gg to help with my school work. cos its medical...or is it.
ANYWAY.
yeah the doctors dont know whats wrong with me

they've never heard of a youth who seemed like she had a stroke.
with her left side going numb after heart palpitations that shook her body upon waking. (no nightmares)
yet she responded fine.
and was fine after 6 hrs.
my heart showed abnormalites in beating, but thats about it.
my left side became weak and numb. so?
they keep postponing my MRI.
im gg to do it this tues.
right before my exhibition. so drama.
i like how God likes to saturate everything in my life into a day.

so they sent me home.
and told me to monitor myself.
after that i was fine.
i guess i kinda knew maybe i was mentally unstable.
HAHAHAHAHAHAH
or why i might have had heart palpitations.
but if so
my body was like hours late to respond.
or maybe i am literally retarded that way.
thanks.

my brain fails me.
time to get a scan.
maybe ill live long.
maybe ill die soon.
idk.

am i scaring you?
i really feel no guilt.
HELLO WHAT IS THIS NUMBNESS.
IVEEE BECOME SO NUMBBB...linkin park sia.
if he really wanted to show he was numb. hed just read his lyrics instead of sing.

ok then after that
another big happening
is that joel fainted HAHA /or got into a fight ahha
and passed out
hit his head
and had a concussion
and i was like
oh no.
seriously.
i thought hed go on having amnesia forever
and call me every few mins to ask where i was and why i never wait for him to wake up
when he was actually awake all this while

fucking human brain is amazing lah
like a computer.
keep rebooting.
super macham movie know.

its like
a short circuit.
some part of the body will just shut down. (me)
or soem part will just keep restarting (jo)
wah lau.

are all artists tied down to this fate of insanity and sickness?
farahsinsanity. HAHAHA cute.
i think nadia's character is very cute oso HAHAHA
maybe cos shes a pisces like me thats why can click =)
so i was thinking maybe thats how i come across too HAHA
cos poeple like to pet my head and hug me.
HAHAHA ok SORRY...i feel inappropriate HAHAHA

ok so another major happening was chingay
which was the day before jo fell.
and he couldnt remember it AT ALL.
which scared the fuck out of me
HAHA
anyway earned shit.
when we treat the foundation students wed have nothing.
at least i can put it in my cert.

whatever.
oh and my exhibtion at the arthouse with a few lasalle students and regional artists
done by yimei jolyn and crew =) thanks guys =)

oh and another big thing
my old friend is flying off for 2 years HAHA
idk why but i feel its like a big thing
cos i didnt really meet him for 3 years.
and the thought of another 2 years of not meeting
would just be plain horrible.
cos he was a really good friend.
anyway met already
HAHA
so now dont feel so bad.
HAHA
or feel more releieved.

OK WHY I ACTUALLY BLOGGED!

i was working on a stupid theme
which when i had my crit.
eveyrone realised that i felt it really was a stupid theme
and that i just wanted to paint
so now i have to scrap everything
and i can just paint WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
=)
BUT im pressed for time
and when u give someone so much
freedom and choice
they ironically become lost
and stuck.

so thats where i am
what to paint what to paint.
i have no opinion.
they said id find my link. my concept when im done.
maybe i should really
just paint
LATER THEY SAY...DONT SEE THE LINK OR CONTINUITY IN MY PAINTINGS.

sigh.

i like to paint.
people.
erm.
because. i like the face.
the emotion.
the ability to imitate emotion.
throught shape and form
it captures people.
attracts people.
i just want people to like my work.
as how i do like and enjoy my work.

i could say i paint what people like.
and that makes me happy.
but thats fucking sad.
ok not all like it.

i like my people to be intense.
scary.
or precious.

i create to attract.
i create an artwork.
mainly to attract,
for people to like it.
not so much of me just liking it is enough.
affirmation and compliments drive me
for people to not understand how i think
i like that. my interpretations of paint.
from photorealism to abstract
like a progression of thoughts.
my indecisiveness.

I AM FUCKING INDECISIVE
or i like things to be decided for me and i go with the flow.

so maybe i should go with the flow in my paintings.
intuition.

play with colour. i like that.
but then thats like what ive been doing for my old paintings.
but i guess i limited myself to children and concept.
i can paint ANYTHING I GUESS
i should try
different subjects
but intrepretation of colour style and technique.

i like to paint subjects.
i dont liek to deal with composition

i should just research on artists.
AND IM FUCKING HUNGRY HAHHAHAHAA.
Ok i need to consult people.
ok
nights =)

this was a really bad way to sum up my post haha nights!

19th-Nov-2010 02:34 am(no subject)

WOW I HAVENT BLOGGED HERE IN AGES!!!! LIKE SERIOUSLY!

i have been to busy with life.
had a privacy issue
had a tolerance problem
had a stress issue
had a disappiontment issue

BUT END OF ASSESSMENT IS THE CURE!!!! AHAHA =)

OK SO SUDDENLY
I REALISE I WANT ALOT OF THINGS.
material and non material.

let me tell u so magically pple will get stuff for me
HAHA

material

1. many small canvases framed
2. special hair brushes
3. damn yummy food haha like atas one!!!
4. more film for mydiana...processed ones...oh 35mm and 120 ones
5. diana add ons...like the polaroid film back one =)
6. havainas!!!
7. pumps
8. my body shop cocoa body butter moisturiserr HAHAHA SMELL DAMN NICE I WANT TO EAT MYSELF HAHAHA
9. drawing sketch book, mini one so i can laern to doodle haha
10. an art studio haha
11. a slave ahah
12. damn style laptop bag
13. my iphone 4!
14. i phone covers!!!
15. good earplugs
16. cheese ahha

non material

1. to create little cut monster animal shit hahaah
2. to draw and paint tehm
3. paint many small paintings in oil. hyper realistically.
4. to experiment more paitning styles
5.idk already haha

ok
this holiday is very busy!!!!

1 big exhibtion and small jobs and trip to china!!!
byee

26th-Sep-2010 03:21 am(no subject)

it has come to my attention
that my anti pimple pills
have had cases of being the cause of depression
in several people.
such that a few people have lost their lives to it.

no wonder i feel so different
and really got very depressed during the holidays
and moodswings have started and all.
and i rarely cried.

but i like my clear skin
and when you stop
the pimples will almost definitly come back.
and i like my now regular flow haha
and it being a contraceptive. i like knowing i can never get pregnant even tho i never do anything haha

the only thing is that they say it makes you put on weight.
but in fact i lost weight.
haha yay for me.

my face is really tired.

23rd-Sep-2010 12:07 am(no subject)

hi.
so this sem
im beginning to feel a great sense of lack of confidence.
is that phrased right?
wel firstly, im becoming very non eloquent. DO YOU SEE IT!
WHAT THE HELL IS THE PROPER WORD FOR NON ELOQUENT.
stupid?
i cant phrase stuff that i mean properly.
the words dont come out the way i want. and my vocab is HORRIBLE.
thank God my grammar is still there.
is it because ive stopped blogging?
i think i should make it a point to blog everyday.

i really find myself stoning into space.
i dont actually think of anything.
and i dont understand why.
esp smoke breaks.
when im stoning. i really dont actually think of anything omg.
i have nothing important to think about.
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME!
ok so most of the time i am laughing about stupid jokes but ya.

and OMG I GOT A FOR MY ESSAY! AHHAHA i dont even know what i wrote i should look at it again.

ok and 2ndly.
i cant sell my work.
i dont know how to speak
its like i lost my charisma.
i used to be super extroverted talking to everyone and all.
sometimes i dont even know what im saying i just sound stupid.
and i cant really phrase my work as beautifully as i feel it. my concept that is.
well there isnt much concept. but nvm.

3rd
im exploring a new style of painting and i dont wanna be exactly like one painter but study from a few you know
but im really dependent on that kind of style already
i need to think more deeper. make my work stand out.
BE AMAZING.
so photorealism is easy for me but so what.
i want something better.

anyway what bother's me the most is that
i dont feel like how i was 3 years or 2 ago.
and i really miss my foundation friends. that group.
idk i feel like if i had one day with them again id remember who i was and i

i have people that believe in me that i would produce awesome works.
but i dont actually beleive in myself any more =(
im afraid to let people and myself down =(

and ever since the holidays
ive been very emotional HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
idk why. the change ah?

anyway...sooo
yesterday yesterday i came home on time was a good girl but suddenly i was given an earlier curfew =(

11 on weekdays and 7pm on weekends for dinner =(
OMG u know it was everyday home for dinner! wtf I had to fight my way for the above timing
idkwhy oso
i guess it just seems very unbecoming of a girl for my parents for me to come home late.
but im a girl in singapore with an intense work load and a studio...=.=

so anyway i asked permission to have my normal curfew at 12 everyday just until next week. because there are loads of stuff due.

1. crit on tues
2. drawing proj tues
3. presentation
4. essay draft =(

sian.

oh and anotehr reason.
i think i mentioned it before.
i feel very stupid.
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
VERY VERY.

and i feel like im no longer the best =(
mainly that.

OMG AND I HAVE BECOME THE KIND THAT WHEN I SIT WITH PEOPLE I DONT FEEL LIKE TALKING SOMETIMES WTF.
hahaa but the kind that i dont notice it.
its like im happy listening.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THAT IS NOT RIGHT HAHAH not me not meeeee!!!

15th-Sep-2010 03:59 am(no subject)

today i realised that
i dont ever try and be close to anyone.
it never starts with me. but them. thank God.
because i have a major trust issue HAHAHAHAHA
but my instincts are always right. ahah
most of the time.
ahha

i actually only tried and make friends with 1 person in lasalle.
and no its not jo ahha
i did that cos i needed a person to talk to for a period of time
and it was an odd choice cos we were merely aquaintances.
and i just simply decided to say. i choose u to be a good friend to and vice versa and started to share HAHA
and i asked for advice.
merely by instict. or random tikam on msn ahha

turns out it was a good choice. character wise.

im not one to go make friends.
but i accept rfiends. i just dont trust them as much. HAHAHAH initially lah.
i dont trust many pple much.
only a handful whom i know cares about me.
but sometimes now and again i always question that.

because people are annoying and unpredictable.
they understand less of themselves than they realise and yet we try and understand them in return.

that being said.
i really am nice. and friendly
and am willing to be a good friend.
depending on how willing you are too.
i dont know what im getting at.
besides the fact that, there is still that underlying..
"i dont trust you"

but until i do, at least 50%
u lucky asses aahah
i got your back.

31st-Aug-2010 01:44 am(no subject)

yay my painting is looking good =)

i think tml can finish

maybe only. i talk cock.

i have nothing for drawing sia.

want to kill me now?

i miss my foundation class mates man.

we were all so tight.

ive been meeting them like abit here and there.

all except van...so sad. ahaha

i want to meet all of them tgt....

pleaseeeee!! fun! AND WE CAN PLAY TABOOO!!! =)haha

and i promise i wont K.O on the couch ahhaa.

28th-Aug-2010 01:37 am(no subject)

HI,

today i sleep so shiok.
can put new songs in my mp3 oso =)
then JO NEVER WAIT FOR ME GO TO SCHOOL.
idiott.
then i go sch.
and we all walk birdbird go meet her friends for a party
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA =)
ok and then

i got reallybored.
cos jo very boring hHAHAHAHAHA
joke ahaha
then go buy dinner
and then draw a bit.
play guitar abit.
then happy happy
then go buy food again haha
and then drink beer.
and die.

AHAHAHHAHAHAA
ok this is so nonsense.
today was very nonsense.
i got a whole line of orhhchehs on my arms. omg.
can form like tattoo band on the arm hahaha

then in the train was super retarded. haaha
seriously retarded idk why oso.
we make fun of everyone sia. damn stupid.

what would life be like if we didnt act goofy once in awhile man..(or everyday haha)
seriously...
i wanna be a goofy girl...woman...old woman..granny... yet be damn hip. with red hair. hahaha

hahaha and i dont think goofyness affects the rating ahhaha

27th-Aug-2010 02:37 am(no subject)

so. im feeling rather happy these days HHAHA
DAMN IT WAS THE MOOD SWINGS

to was really good
cos tiffane visited me =) haha
and we got to catch up in like damn longgggg
and then i caught up with marcus and his friends haha

and then we had a opening
and we stocked up our beer.
and i didnt eat dinner again. ahaha
i share fries with jo only.
omgggg how can he eat so lil sia... he boy.
hahahaa

anyway then fuming joined us to drink
for the 1st time
HE ANOTHER ONE NEVER EAT ONE!!! 9 wang wangs in a day.wtf
my gawd im sitting with 2 poor boys
ahah
yayy so drinking was fun ahha

and then today i got rated higher than a eeyer girl HAHAHA
I ask jo to rate again cos EEYEER he blind ahha
and im sorry i give u so low HAHAHHAHAAHAHHAA
make him sad only
i actually feel really bad hHAHA
but its ...eh idk what he say,,what eye waht eye HAHAHAH IDK
NVM but it made alot of sense hahaa

ANYWAYS TODAY WAS FUNNNNS! =)
cos i talked to many many pple today ahahaha

oHHHHH

AND I NATASHA IS MY SAC DRAMA JUNIOR!

OMG SO FUN TO REMINISCE =)))))

nowonder today so happy hahaha

24th-Aug-2010 04:02 am(no subject)

im so bloody darn angry these days.
because people are so stupid. because
people are annoying
because people are greedy
and people dont weigh consequences.

wtf. no wonder my teacher is losing faith in the human race.
and i couldnt help but agree at the point.

but not even i am exempted from this annoying syndrome.
for i.
i am and i know
that i am caught up in life.
a life that i have no control if.
it feels like im being carried through the waves and accepting what ever falls upon me.
i have no control of situations my near future.
i am being held back
for it is not that im not in control of my actions
but the very fact that i have no actions.
thus does that meani have no brain?
no function?
am i purely aesthetic?
not very much aesthetic of me is there.

it seems i am a piece of decoration
like
a baby blanky. thats the closest piece of matter i seem to function as.
use your brain to figure it out.

how annoying am i that i am reduced to a mere piece of matter
for i do not produce good.
i do not produce meaning.
or create meaning for myself.
im like a blankey blown in the wind.
oh yippeee dooo dahhhh.

can i grow some brains to think clearly
im glad this is proof of abit more of brains plus my old self.
can i grow some hands so i can carry out actions
and can i grow some heart.
so i can be brave and deal with whatever that i may have not done
for it is not working well at all.
not one bit.
it is sick.
do not put heart and sick together. it is too selfish.
it is spoilt in a sense of literal physicality of which i mentioned earlier
it is working too well you may say.
too much for a little blankey like me.

i would like to always be a blankey.
i smell nice.
i feel nice.
and i am special.
but may i be deformed in a sense that you may call it fucking evolution
so i can survive in this world.
like how mammals came from reptiles.
i find that horrifying.

if i annoy myself to such a high level
what more should i have the right to complain about the stupidity of mankind.
everybody wants the best.
but not eveyrbody knows whats best.
we just act.
or dont act.
and both ways. we are stupid

tell me what is the perfect combination?
only gathering of information to question.
not to get the truth. for the truth is useless.
question for the breakdown of ideas.
of the root of the whys. until we inturn annoy by asking.
is that what will save us all?
knowledge?

then why do so many philosophers get sphylis? (an std i unfortunately cannot spell)
they were never happy.

is happiness the way we wanto go?
it makes us survive the days thats what it does.
but when one is happy. make sure its not at the expense of others.

i am vengeful.
but i do not have the heart to carry it out.
but i have the mind.
dont let my mind take over.
i am too extreme
but.
dont let my heart take over.
i am too soft.

am i what you call an extremist?

iin all that i disappoint in.
i believe in horroscopes to a certain level.
it knows me more than i could clarufy myself as.
i am a pisces.
i dream.
i get really happy.
or really sad.

no one wants to know about me....
=(

its ok.
even i dont know me sometimes.
im all very new.
its very confusing.

what of me is retained?
it scares me that i am a variable.

what of me is left. that I may use to control order?

if you threw somethig at me
i wouldnt know how id respond
id respond with mood.
i differ too much.
i hate change.
am i change?
no wonder i kinda hate myself right now.

i would rather like to be a purchase than change. =(

22nd-Aug-2010 03:51 pm(no subject)

so yesterday was kinda bad...
heheh

rushed to finish movie review.
then went to meet the guys to drink
and then more friends came.
and it got really late.
but i was having alot of fun HAHAHAHHAHAH

And i didnt eat dinner.
and i puked in the toilet.
(its like it just came out.. not even uncomfortable feeling haha)

and then later i got sad all of a sudden
and then i cried.
it was so lame.
and im so sorry.
ahhahahahahahahaha

i dont think it's a valid enough reason for me to cry over hahhaa
its so lame.
im solame.
so.

sorry.
i kinda spoiled pple's mood ah.

and then i woke with puffy eyes.
and my mum dont believe i have headache. =(
so. idk.
it made me sad again. she said im just lazy i dont wanna wake up for church. but i felt sick =(

nvm.
ok.
sigh.

=(

i gotta be less annoying
these mood swings can kill me

21st-Aug-2010 01:15 am(no subject)

SO...
today the whole day i felt damn lousy.

im a lousy 21 year old.

so what if i can paint and sing.

i am so stupid.
i cant sum up any energy to do my movie review
and my brain is not big enough
to absorb everything.
or regurgitate coherently.

WTH. i should be smarter than that.

i cant have a solid idea for my project to work on.
i dont have interest in what im doing
WTH THAT'S THE WORST!!!

AND EVERYTHING IS ANNOYING ME!!!
people are annoying me.
only silence is not.
but after awhile it is.

ok i think my period is coming HHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

OMG IT'S HEREE!!!! HAHAHAA GROSS
too much info

I HATE THIS.
i get super emo at night and in the morning.
ruth asked me...
why are your tweets so emo.
because the truth is i am emo
but early in the morn and late at ngiht only when im alone in my room HAHAHAHAHAHA
MAYBE GROUCHY. im just not satisfied with anything.
anything anything.
me. people. things. school. time. reason. outcomes.

make me less emo please??? =(

i know only i can do that haha. :/

19th-Aug-2010 10:45 am(no subject)

hi so nowadays i have noticed something.
and it's quite recent.
and this is about study of the human body and mind. i like HAHHAA maybe can use for my proj.

SO AFTER MY VERY WEIRD EMO PHASE.
where i thought it has mild depression or something.
HAHAHHA
but i never said this anywhere cept on my blog lah. so.
yeah
anyway i got used to it HAHHAHA and i became better.
esp since i went to travel abit

ok so like nowadays.
when even i suddenly think of something sad.
or something that makes me angry.

my heart actually suddenly gets really ticklish at the top HAHHAHAA
and it makes me feel like crying
like literally. and it feels like it dropped abit HAHHAHAA.

IM NOT TRYING TO SOUND SAPPY. i actually find this interesting.

so i was wondering like. is this normal.

this is called a heart ache right?
hhahahah eww

and the stuff i think about really isn't that sad to begin with to have a heartache
ahaha

maybe im just really emo sometimes.

but when i was younger and i cried over sad things or had really sad moments
that are seriously sadddd
i never had heart aches. AHAHHAA
Or that ticklish feeling.

weird.
is my heart failing. or is it stronger or is my brain more emo ahaha.
or stressed? HAHAHA

"The brain is a powerful thing! Just as people who medical science had given up can heal, sadness can cause certain muscles to tighten and ache including your heart.
Shock and pain can completely interfere with your regular body functions - with sadness taking over to cause a literal heartache. "

19th-Aug-2010 01:27 am(no subject)

hi so i dont know why i opened the post page.
but

hi.
erm.

today im so tired.

so. today i went to school for a lecture.
and a mindblowing tutorial
and now i feel abit stupid that my brain is not fast or big enough.
to absorb everything that was said.

if i were sylar i would steal her brainnnnn HAHAHAHHAHA

Then went for painting. YAY NEW PROJS =)

went for phunk studio and japanese artists opening.
DAMN COOLL!!!
burritos were awesome!!! I LOVE BURRITOS!!!

then went to see von's gig!!! YAYYYYY
her 1st gig!! at ben and jerry's

then went back
and
slack wah lau
until so late.

i think i should start doing my work already
i dont like the feeling of going to school
for the purpose of attendance. to eat. and slack.

plus i dont like to slack anymore HAHHHAHAHAHA.
i wanna do work.
and bring all my stuff down.
iguess i'll bring my paints down on monday
hmmm but i need to start painting.
maybe on a weekend.
or mon hahah

OK TML I MUST START WORK!!!

TML!!!

I WILL GO AND
1. FINISH MY 500 WORD REVIEW
2. do thinking and build on ideas for my drawing proj and self proposed.
3. find a picture for my painting elective.
4. maybe go to artfriend. maybenot.

ok yup.
i hate aimlessness.

and singing is starting to bore me =(

15th-Aug-2010 08:35 pm(no subject)

check outs my new red hairrr

emo version haha

i wanted orange like bright soft orange
but they didnt have it i was really sad.
i suggested the mix stuff and play with the timing to get the look
but they thought i was crazy
i was dead serious
so i took a orange higlight and a brown-red base
and the orange highlights turnedout red highlights.
so

TADAAAAA
looks quite nice ah HAHAHA

my mum says i look bitchy AAHAH
but my hair super red in the sun i likeeee ehaha

14th-Aug-2010 01:44 am(no subject)

wah lau i need to think of something for proposal
im supposed to research on something that interests me
but somehow
NOTHING INTERESTS ME MUCH NOWADAYS =(

so i had to go to my fb page and see what i wrote down as interest hahaha

so its like philosophy, reasoning, liek why things work like that ah, and surrealism and dreams and portraiture.

AND THEN I GOT REALLY EXCITED
COS I CAN COMBINE EVEYRHTING AND ITS FUCKING INTERESTING FOR ME HAHAHAHHAHAHA

SO IM LIKE GOING TO DO SOMETHING BASED ON DREAMS AND SURREALISM AND INCORPORATE IT IN PORTRAITURE AND RESEARCH ON THE BRAIN AND ITS SUBCONCIOUS AND HOW IT AFFECTS OUR THINKING AND BEHAVIOUR SUBCONSCIOUSLY.

YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

OK ITS VERY MESSY I NEED TO MAKE IT COHERENT HAHA BUT YA YAYYYY

12th-Aug-2010 11:40 pm - DENISE YOUR BRAIN IS BLOODY DEPLETING!!!

hi.
is it a bit too late
or too recent for me to be feeling
this sense of loss of self again?
HAHAHAHAH FUCKIGN ANNOYING.

today i was fucking angry in the morn.
1 i was late already
and was searching for my cuttingpad which was missing
so i digged into my art crate
and found my pallete of WET PAINT IN THE MIDDLE OF EVERYTHING

OMFG!! MY MAID PUT IT THERE!!!!!
STUPID OR WHAT!!
i feel really bad calling her stupid.
i kinda triggers this idea of animal cruelty in my brain
and makes me feel even worse cos i just linked her to a a stupid animal.
so.

BUT STILLL
WHY THE HELL! U DONT KNOW HOW TO SEE THE BLOBS OF PAINT SO BIG STILL JUST CHUCK IT INSIDE WITH THE ART STUFF
and she knows i paint oil paint and i told her before i takes at least a week to dry abit for FLAT IMAGES
this is a bloody BLOB OF PAINT.

omg.
SO LIKE SO MANY OF MY STUFFF!!! GOT PAINT ALL OVERR~!!
AND WHEN I DUG MY HAND IN!!! GOT PAINT ALL OVER!!
AND I WAS REALLY MADDD
cos a damnnn nice sake bottle got smeared all over.

and i dont like her to touch my art stuff
that time cos i keep my art stuff under the toilet sink

SHE PUT THE TOILET BRUSHES INSIDE SIAAAAA
WAH LAUUU

SO FUCKING DIRTY!!!!

I WAS SO MADDD!!!

AND new thing i learnt about myself.
i get angry much easier already.
MUCH MUCH. and i get really mad.

but i kept my cool today.
cos. i was raelly more disappointed than angry.
and i was late for sch.

and i was so black faced later on. =( spoil my whole mood.
really.
so undenise like i dont like.

yeah one more thing i noticed.

IM STARTING TO LOSE MY EQ SKILLS!!! WTFFF!!
can feel u know.
u feel it when
you're not in control of a situation
or when you say something and then u feel awkward hahahahahahaha
or you just dont feel like talking at all.

maybe im just mood swingy
cos im always laughing at stupid stuff.
and my friend who is next to me is always very stupid (in a good way?)

but nowadays i cant be bothered to laugh.
im not as entertained HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH SO ASS.

and i realise i keep making fun out of EVERYTHING!!!!
OMG.
im becoming annoying to myself. ahha
but my grp of friends really makes fun out of EVEYRTHING
sometimes its abit tiring when im in my moods.

THAT TIME.
anotehr grp was having a serious intellectual talk.
which i really enjoy bloody hell
but i went

im gg to sit over there by myself.
im not in the mood for so cheem stuff.
and i sat there by myself and was happy
as i waited for jo to smoke finish.

WTHHHHHH

DENISE YOU BRAIN
IS BLOODY
DEPLETEING!!!

AND I HAVE NO INTERESTING IDEAS OF ISSUE FOR MY NEW PROJ!! ARGHHH

summary.
i think i used to be more charming and responsible HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

now im just a bloody joker and slacker.

and i actually know why....
but things arent gonna change....
maybe by another way.

8th-Aug-2010 05:34 pm(no subject)

soooo...
jo and i did an artwork last mth or last last and it got featured
as they were interviewing the new art cafe...

our work got special attention haha
but its not up to our standard =( oh wells
we still own eveyrbodya hahaa

1. no its not BELLA!!
2. its kristen stewart (yes there is a diff)
3. we just used her as huamn reference
4. its not fan art.
5. they make it look like fan art. im so sad.
=(

ahhahaha
ok
bai

i bought 2 more dresses and a top ahhaha

8th-Aug-2010 01:41 am(no subject)

HIIII~!!!!

I GOT THE PHOTOS OF PERTH READY AHHAA

=)) YAYYY

OK SO HERE ARE THE DIANA SHOTS.

i should take more crossprocessed ones
anyway im getting less fail shots!! yayy!!!

35mm expired film normal uh... iso 800

yayyyyyy
seeeee not as bad~!!! less shaky and less overexposed =)

ok now for my lx3

WAH LAU. I TOTALLY FORGOT BOUT MY BLOG HALFWAY FOR LIEK AN HR
AHHAHAHA

AND

hahahahahhahthis damn funny ahahahah\

ok bai!!!

2nd-Aug-2010 07:15 pm(no subject)

omg i can forget to blog!!!

HELLO GUYS DID U MISS ME!!?!!

ok i shall keep this short.

1. got back from perth sunday morning
2. it was freaking awesome pics will be up soon

FUCKING FOUND OUT SCH WAS THE NEXT DAY WTF

3. sunday night went for cheryl lim's bday!!! =) <3
4. 1st day of sch had major migrane when i woke and family woke me up an hr earlier =(
5. called joel to wake up but instead accidently called cheryl's good friend to wake up cos she used my phone to call him
and i mistook the number HAHAHAH I WAS LIKE ...

EHHH WAKE UPPP!!!!
huhhh for what?
time to go to school man!!
what? i have no school?
huh what talking you yes u have sch today 1st day
huh i have no school lehhh..
eh...who is this? ahaha
urm brian?
er..thats weird...joel use this phone to call me yesterday what...
ohh joell?
ohh you know joel??
erm no?
huhhh??? wait who is this?
brian?
who's brian sia i dont know any brian
huh who is this then
denise lah?
OH DENISE AH
huh you know me?? ahhahahaha OMG CHERYL'S FRIEND BRIAN!!! OMFG IM SO SOSO SOSOSOOSOSOSOS SORRY!!! HAHAHA OMG U CAN STILL ANSWER ME SO LONG W/O ASKING WHO AM I AH?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

WAH LAU that call is like epic lah ahha
i was so embarrassed
FUCKING EARLY OSO CAN!!!! 8 AM!!! HAHAHAHAH

ok then i went to school.
was bored.

visited tiffany with fuming
and then went for lect

and omg
i love art theory now.
ahahahahaha
shubigi is so funny and sarcastic i love it!! HAHAHHA
I DIDNT EVEN SLEEEP!! AHHAHA

Then i got very tired and anti social i decided to go home quite awhile after class
and

I MISSED THE EZ LINK RENEWABLE STATION 2 MINS AFTER IT CLOSED!!!

OMG
IM SO SAD!!!!!
2ND TIME!!!!!!!

WAH LAU FREAKING 6 BUCKS TO GO SCH AND BACK BY MRT
STUPID NEW PAY BY DISTANCE THING. NOT LIKE ITS VERY FAR RIGHT!!!!
ISNT IT ALWAYS BEEN PAY BY DISTANCE???!! WAH LAU
how did 2.30 become 2.80 cheelaka

and i never eat lunch today i forgot.

im gg to jog laterrr
I CAN FEEL MY FATS GROWING AROUND ME!! AHHAHA

ive been saying that since japan
but my ffriend say i lost weight
it was really weird
then i went to somewhere in winter
i think
cos winter
then will harvest fats HAHAHHAHA
COS DAMN COLD AHHAH and makes u eat alot
and then the japan food only take effect now.
funny how ive come to spore

and day 2. i ate half a bowlof instant noodle the whole day!!!!

=(
ok i am starvings...

OMG LATER AUSTRALIA FOOD ONLY TAKE EFFECT NEXT NEXT WEEK!
OH SO SAD!!!!!!!
NVM

spore diet will take effect after that
i swear i dont eat alot HAHAHHA
SO SADDDD SO UNFIAR FOR ME
just cos i eat like human during the holidays HAHHAHAHAHAA

OK I SHOULD STOP WHINING.

i have no jeans.
besides what i wore today

i have shorts and dress.

omg i have to think what to wear everday now.

23rd-Jul-2010 12:33 am(no subject)

GOOD BYE!!!
I'M FLYING OFF TML AFTERNOON!

=(
i dont really wanna go.
but nvm.

anyways today was utterly horrible from the moment i woke.
but nvm.

it became much better when i received my photos from the lab.
=)

soooo outta 1 120 film and 1 35mm roll.
thats like 47 shots.
only.
like 1/4 PASS hahahah

so these are my fave shots.

some expired 120 cross processed film 100 iso.

yup nice right! but the rest really like crap ah. so blur and over exposed =(

then i have not so nice pics from japan.
the normal 35mm film iso 400
THESE ARE THE ONLY ONES THAT PASSED! HAHAHA
the rest is EVEN MORE CRAP

WAH LAU AND THIS SHOT SO MUCH POTENTIAL WTH IS THIS WHITE FILM OVER IT. =(

my livingroom haha

HAHAHAHAHHAHA AND WAH ALU THSI ONE WORST OF ALL!
IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A GRP SHOT OF FOUR! HAHA
NEVER LET OTHER PPLE TAKE PHOTO FOR YOU!!!!!!!
SOME RANDOMGIRL. itold her must stand further back already
still she take until SOOOOOOO BAD AH. not even one head pass hHAHAHAHA

Ok bye. =(
im to lazy to do my ipod leh =(
hmmm.
but i should put in all my guns n roses and velvet revolver.
i might crash AHAHAHA

ok. bye.

=(

cant wait for school

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